SUSTAINING FAMILY BONDS ...

SUSTAINING FAMILY BONDS

It is another edition of Olabusola's Review. Today I am going a bit personal. Oh Yes! I like to share something that happened to me last week.

It happened that I had left a mental note to call an Uncle of mine. So on this particular day, when his thought crossed my mind, I did justice to the thought, by putting a call through to him, just to ask of his well being and to discuss an unfinished transactions. Now when the call went through, his response was " Olabusola, please I am working on the subject of our last discussion, but at the moment am at LUTH with one of your cousins who was involved in an accident". I asked him, how it happened and he said, the young man tried avoiding a bus then a car ran into him just at that spot.

I later rushed down to the hospital to see my supposed cousin and I was surprised not by the extent of the accident but by his reactions and how vibrant he was, despite the just concluded surgery. He was a bit restless but was awake and responding to the few people around and given them hope. 

He had just come out of Theatre and was waiting at the instruction of the Doctor, to be taken to his ward, after been scanned. My Uncle soon touched his hand and introduced me to him as his cousin. 
Even though I felt bad about his condition, I also felt glad meeting a cousin of mine. For the record, i grew up knowing less than ten cousins of mine, so family bond is one of my pet project.  One lesson that reinforced in me at that spot was that, in all things give thanks. 

I stayed a while then later left the Hospital environment with my Uncle. We chatted while driving along the way, about how I was related to this particular cousin of mine and I wondered when i will eventually get to know a handful of my cousins. 

Two days later I went back to the hospital to see my cousin and it was at this point, that fate played me a movie. It happened that my Uncle was about leaving the hospital when I got into the hospital premises, and so he hurriedly led me to the ward, were in my cousin was admitted.

He had followed me to ensure my cousin recalls who I was. Now upon entering the ward, I saw this self motivated young guy who still looked good despite the few bruises on his face. I could see so much strength in him. Infact, you will lack the exact words to console or encourage him because, he his an epitome of courage. I also marveled at the numbers of well wishers that surrounded him at the time of my visit. 

He is quite a vibrant young man and full of life, his laughter met with my Uncle's re-introduction, he nodded that he remembered me, and responded that he saw me when I visited earlier. Now as my Uncle made to leave, as he could not drive at night, so he was leaving us at about 6: 30 pm Nigerian time. He then pointed to a young guy whose look was quite attractive. He had that kind of "fine boy looks". The guy look so calm and adorable but my admiration was short lived when my Uncle, completed his statement that, he is also your cousin and in my mind I was like OH My World, Cousin ? I only smiled as all eyes were on us.

Now my "first cousin", who was now feeling better, was seated on his bed and he beckoned on me to come closer. I moved closer to his bed and before he got into his usual jokes with his friends, he pointed at my second cousin and said, look at this guy, "I worked with him for ten (10) years and it has been some beautiful years. He has always been my Boss but today he is my blood brother". 

At this point I was overwhelmed as i realized that, these two gentle men had worked together yet they never knew they were related. One heard the other was ill and came to check on him. It was at that point that our Uncle introduced the two to themselves.. 

It is still a shock to me, to think these two young men were colleagues for over ten (10) years yet they were oblivious of their blood line. Fate only made, the accident and hospital visit as the medium of revelation and connection. 

Now the morale of this, is that, it does not matter who we are or the circumstances around us, let us be good to all mankind. Hostility does not breed good relationship. You will be shocked at lives that your good works will save.


Secondly I wonder why it is so hard to build family bonds. I advice we try to build family bonds. It is okay to discipline your children to be content and all that, but once in a while I think parents should also allow their children to relate with some of their relatives. 

We are always busy and busy yet we find time to attend people's burial, just to pay our last respect to people we rarely related with. An occasional visit will help your children know their history and bloodline. There is strength in relationship.

 I equally know some parents have their reasons for keeping to their nuclear family however, generations are extending by the day and we need to connect with ourselves. They do not need to know everyone, but at least let them know a good number. Who will tell your tale when you are gone. Whether we like it or not, we are Africans, and we thrive on family-bond. You can not live in isolation all your life. You don't need to travel home all the time but once in a while show your children pictures, tell them about your family and that of your spouse. Some youths today can't describe their hometown. 

God is the only protector, who is able to preserve your children from all evil, as most parents have for the unknown. I fear that what you fear may happen if you do not stop the fear. The fear of the danger attached to relating with relatives is also another factor. We forget, our protection is not in hiding, (ASIDE) "if a witch plan your matter, they will get you even in the ice". This is the essence of teaching your children in the way of the Lord, so when they grow up and relate they will only bring forth from the values you have impacted in them.

I must say, that am very proud to be associated to these two great men, well beyond the blood and good character, we also have our noses in common...Lol!


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